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Monday, Nov. 26, 2007 - 12:57 p.m.

Words are not enough, but Thank You

It was a great Thanksgiving dinner. Not the best ever but considering the last few years, it ranks up there at the top. S came over the week before with some beef 2s gave us, and said she had the holiday with her dad, but nowhere to go, so I invited them over for some roast beef. As she and I and 800 sat around the table, turkey on the menu came up. 800 even offered to move the bird and the fish off the kitchen counter where I usually set the roaster, and also mentioning 2d and e. I took that as an OK for dinner, and started inviting the others.

I am never going to start inviting some and not others. If one is welcome, everyone is, and vice-versa. That is where all the trouble started a few years ago. 2d has told me before that I just need to plan what I want to do and if 800 wants to boycott things, let him. I hated to do that because I didn't want the disfavored ones to know why he did so. Avoidance seemed to me the best option. 2d said I can't orchestrate everything, and she is right. But I can put the blame on me; I am not his favorite person, and in light of years past, that would be very believable and true reasoning for his actions.

Anyway, I proceeded with dinner invitations and preparation with much thanksgiving and excitement. I knew that d could not come, and his mom probably wouldn't, 2s oldest daughter had to cover at the hospital for a woman with a family, but everyone else was eager to come. 2s was even going to come for just dinner if he had to work, since he is now salaried and can be more flexible.
The other shoe dropped Monday or
Tuesday when 2d told me 800 said he wasn't going to be there. I was at the library, and could hardly hold back the tears as she told me. I had just finished several days of rejoicing and I knew You had been directing. That is the only thing that kept me from cancelling once again. Now more orchestrating. I was going to bear the blame, tho, and would have if necessary. My shoulders are broad and strong. And it wouldn't be a lie to say I wasn't the favorite. I thought I was going to have to do that very thing right up to 45 minutes before the meal, and just asked You for the strength not to cry, or be cynical. Just matter of fact.

800 had left around 10 Thursday morning, just saying he had to water the rest of the rabbits. I was busy preparing everything, and never noticed the pickup was gone until almost noon. I am also thankful for the peaceful heart You gave me then. Que sera, sera. My plans were to do all the prep work, tell everyone the dinner was at 4 pm and have it ready right then. Some had to go other places that evening and with short enough visiting time, perhaps nothing would happen. Worked like a charm, altho not for the reasons I was fearing. 2d was bring pies and the sweet potato cassarole, and I had everything else ready. 3s got here from bigbigtown about one and a half hours early, the 3 girls and 2s half an hour before dinner and 800 a few minutes later.

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