2002-06-05 - 10:10 a.m.

Done

Spent the last few days, maybe weeks pouting, whining, and having a mahvalous pity pahty but I am done now.

It doesn't really matter who I am, it matters who You are, and You are still the same, yesterday, today, forever. Every so often I start letting what others think and say sidetrack me from where You lead. I always end up in the same place, at the end of myself with nowhere to look but up!

It is so tempting to want and seek after acceptance, but the hard lesson learned over and over is that I am 'accepted in the Beloved' and usually nowhere else.

I planted some tomatoes and cukes yesterday in the tiny garden space, the wheelbarrow and the farm grain planter. I also planted some cuke seeds, ugly tomato seeds, baby's breath and poppy seeds on the deck in various pots. I did that last week and can see sprouts coming up. As soon as the garden spot is watered today, I will plant leaf lettuce and radishes and that will be my garden for another year. The asparagus seeds are coming in thick around the rhubarb pland and all the roses look healthy.

At work, I was asked to join a peer advocacy group to work with outside agencies, and management to try to alleviate some of the confusion about future plans available for displaced workers. The Dept of Labor, the local colleges, and other groups are marshalling forces and programs to help folks find new careers, skills, or jobs when the plant closes. To my surprise, this peer advocacy thing can turn into a job itself with pay depending on how much one wants to get involved with their peers. I might as well give it a try. Almost every day, the other lab techs ask me about GED's, Compass tests, and things of that nature. It is almost like being back in the Learning Center again making out projections for my high school students. Many of the folks I visit with just drifted into plant work, never realizing what they were capable of doing until they started to succeed in their jobs. The high-tech nature of most of the work there now has made them realize they are intelligent enough to tackle almost anything.

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